Grief, Healing, and the Akashic Records: Finding Purpose After Loss

By Alison

“Perhaps they are not stars, but rather openings in Heaven where the love of our lost ones pours through and shines down upon us to let us know they are happy.”

— Inuit Proverb

When Grief Steals the Years

There are so many times I’ve sat with the thought: Did I mess up with my children?

I think every parent feels that kind of self-doubt at some point, but for me, it became almost unbearable. I’d flip through old pictures and notice the way their smiles lit up the room, the innocence in their eyes—and so many of those moments were when their father was still alive.

The years after he passed feel like a blur. Honestly, I don’t remember much of them at all. Maybe it was brain fog, maybe it was the medication, maybe it was the alcohol I used to numb the pain—or maybe it was all of it combined. Those three years were survival mode at its rawest. I’d wake up wondering how I was going to get through the day with the hangover while taking Advil. Then trying to decide when it was “too early” to pour another drink, or if maybe I should’ve already had one. Reflecting back to those years, I really didn’t think I had a problem with drinking, but I probably did.

Looking back now, I ache for the time I lost when my children were young. I cry when I think about the moments my children won’t get with their father—school events, life lessons, the guidance he would’ve given. Sometimes the grief feels too heavy, and I avoid those photos altogether because I loved those years of their life so much; when their father was alive.

Starting a New Chapter

But over time, and especially as I’ve worked in the Akashic Records about my soul’s journey, I’ve started to see things differently. I’ve come to understand that I am a soul having a human experience. And while this wasn’t the path I would have chosen, it was the one my soul needed. The Records have shown me that my husband’s soul completed his journey here – in the physical world – and my children’s souls chose me as their mother—knowing that this would be part of their story too. The way they lost their father.

That doesn’t take away the pain. But it does give it meaning. I can’t go back to those early years, and I can’t rewrite the past. What I can do is show my children resilience. I can teach them that life, even when it breaks us, still holds purpose. And I can honor my husband’s memory by living with compassion, by sharing my story, and by guiding others who find themselves in that same fog of grief.

I started studying the Records in February 2025, but always had a strong intuition, déjà vu occurrences, empathetic abilities, and avid dreamer. My “clairs” increased with my husband’s passing (which will be another post) and I needed to learn to control them or I was going to be on medication and drowning my sorrows in alcohol for the rest of my life. So, I found a teacher.

What is the Akashic Records?

The Akashic Records are often described as the energetic “library” of your soul. Think of them as a vibrational field that contains the record of every thought, word, action, emotion, and intention your soul has experienced—not just in this lifetime, but across all lifetimes. Yes, we are talking about previous lifetimes you have lived.

They are sometimes called the “Book of Life.”  In truth, they aren’t a physical place but rather an energetic dimension of consciousness. When you access the Records—whether through prayer, meditation, or an experienced reader—you connect with your soul’s wisdom. This can provide clarity in patterns in your life, healing/releasing of energy, guidance into your life purpose, relationships, spiritual path, just about anything and while bringing you peace with knowing your life has a meaning.

It’s important to know that the Akashic Records are not fortune-telling. They don’t predict the future or give you a fixed outcome. Instead, they reveal possibilities and guidance that align with your soul’s highest path.

Every soul has its own Record. When you open yours, you are connecting with your divine truth—the essence of who you are. For many people, the Records are a source of profound healing, self-understanding, and spiritual awakening.

The Akashic Records and My Soul Purpose

The Akashic Records have led me to my soul purpose. When I first learned about the Records, I booked a reading—and like so many people, my very first question was: “What is my soul purpose?”

At that time, I was completely lost. I had lost my husband. I had lost my career. I had uprooted my life and moved to a new state. Everything felt like it was in pieces, and I didn’t know how to put myself back together. I knew deep inside that there was more to my life than just raising children and substitute teaching, but I had no idea what that “more” was.

That reading gave me the confirmation I needed to create this blog. It reminded me that my story mattered, that my healing journey could also help others, and that I wasn’t alone in navigating the devastation of unexpected loss. The message that came through was simple, yet profound: Find your joy again. Share your story. Speak your truth.

Once I heard those words – I knew exactly what I needed to do. I could have easily gone on TikTok or Facebook, blasting out videos and posts—but I wanted to stay hidden. Not out of shame for what had happened, but out of fear. Fear that I would fail. Fear of judgement. Fear that maybe I was the only one struggling to make sense of life after loss. So, I chose to write a blog, where my identity was still hidden – to a certain point.

I’ve finally came to realization those fears were part of the journey too. Each hurdle taught me something about myself, my identity, and my soul. They pushed me closer to my true essence and helped me find the peace I had been searching for. And to finally come out and say “I’m an Akashic Record Practitioner” has never felt so honest, so purifying to my soul’s alignment.